You Do Not Wear Yellow In The Office, Exclamation Mark

Companies enforce a range of policies (dress-code, recruitment, non-smoking, etc) but does it help us to better at what we do, or can we strive in boundaryless work environment? Let's find out and al

Excuse me, can I talk to you for a minute…?
I think it's time we got this straight
Sit and talk face to face
There is no way you could mistake
Him for your man, are you insane?
You see I know that you may be
Just a bit jealous of me
But you're blind if you can't see
That his love is all in me…”

Some of you might have recognised the lyrics of one of the biggest RnB songs from the 90s, “the boy is mine” by Brandy and Monica. The 90s had this unique combination of freedom and order at the same time. In 1989, as the Berlin Wall crumbled and the Western world embraced the neoliberalism doctrine, Youth was ruled by the ‘no label’ spirit. Tribes were formed, codes were more rigid, and everyone knew where they belonged. Let’s take a closer look, shall we?

Along with greasy hair, Rock lovers had Radiohead, Red Hot Chili Peppers and Nirvana to embrace the rebel spirit. Manu Chao was busy inspiring the believers of fair trade and third world debt cancellation that a new world is possible, well don’t hold your breath on this. And the R&B groovers and shakers were breaking their backs on the dancefloor enjoying Fat Man, Dr Dre and Rodney Jerkins productions. Everything was clear, simple. There was no confusion.

30 years later, however it seems that every part of our living experience is being stretched to embrace the concept of full fluidity; working from home has completely distorted the concept of time and space, whilst the rise of IA and augmented reality is slowly but surely blurring the line between what humans can and should be doing to remain competitive in the job market whilst gender non-conformity has never been so prevalent in the Western world.

As I queued at my local coffee house I couldn't help wondering if the excess of fluidity is a nasty allergic reaction to the ‘no label’ spirit. Has it caused  this need to express one’s personality through over-labelling? Or could it be that this need for fluidity is the ultimate expression of the no label philosophy?

If you can be everything to everybody, are you also no one to nobody? So I guess that a regular dude, with regular problems, drinking regular milk in their cappuccino is not anyone’s taste anymore?

As usual I digress. 

The best advice I was given when I started managing people was “Just don't be a dick and everything will be fine”. Even now these words resonate in my ears when dealing with BAU managers’ challenges.

So the question to ask yourself could be, when do you become a dick?

Is it when you start micro managing someone and asking for constant updates and mandatory approvals and attendance? Although micro-management is justified by those who have a “let it go” disorder, the reality of business is that no one has the time to micromanage. This type of management is generally the last tool to improve someone's performance. So if you think your boss falls in this category you might reflect on it a bit more.

So, do you cross the line, and become a D or even a C, when you do not bother at all about your direct report, and give them full autonomy? Interestingly, for many employees it is the ideal scenario, but they might not take into account their manager can revert to Super Micro Manager when all hell breaks loose. Also, with the assumption that everyone’s needs should be met by others, including their managers, can this type of nonchalant management style be truly the one to adopt in the long run?

Personally, the worst manager would be the “boundaryless” type. One of the characteristics of their management style is their inability to define clear roles and responsibilities within their team and their colleagues. Another of their qualities is to fuel a foggy relationship, bending the boundaries of professional relationships, acting like a close friend whilst demanding work to be done yesterday.  

As Ariane Bilheran, a French philosopher, clinical psychologist, Doctor in psychopathology specialised in harassment at work interestingly puts it;, “It is when there is confusion, then you see transgressions”.

Many victims of bullying or, to a worse extent, of sexual harassment at work, declare that the hardest part of these situations is not just acts in itself but the stress and anxiety that derive from a boundaryless atmosphere where confusion is rampant. For instance, a weekly and casual team meeting becomes a sinister place to receive disparaging comments in front of other colleagues. The kitchen, which is the place to gather for a break or share gossip, becomes the scene of inappropriate behaviour, which will eventually trigger a surge in stress leaving the victim in a more desperate state. 

Not fun, is it?

Putting in place healthy and structured boundaries is a necessity as it prevents awkward and inefficient situations where team members might duplicate work or make them feel they are in competition. Boundaries might also deter excessively confident managers, who have been praised for their performance, to send blunt emails or act in an entitled manner. This might also help junior members understand work etiquette and how constant effort is de rigueur in every part of their work. Yes, healthy boundaries are necessary.
 

But wait a second. If I, for various reasons, were to demand - sorry - ask my  colleagues politely to not wear yellow when I am in the office, would I be acting like a borderless manager or a borderline colleague?

When considering someone’s request as wacky, it is also important to check out the impact, the intent and the feasibility. Requesting to not wear yellow in the office is, unfortunately, not possible to enforce - believe me I have tried and HR does not want to support me on this. As this request is slightly unusual to say the least, my colleagues continue to shamelessly ignore my demands. But what about the intent? Could it be a perfidious way to push the boundaries, or is it a playful way to build rapport with my colleagues?

Whatever your thoughts may be, let me conclude by saying that If I see you strutting around the office in your favourite yellow outfit, you’ll probably be getting a look that reminds you that yellow is not yours, but mine. Yes mine!